I did something to make him stop
What did I do to make him stop loving me...?
Was it my unconditional love?
Was it because I wanted to spend time with him?
Was it my kisses, my hugs, my smiles to greet him?
Was it my phone calls just to say hi?
Maybe it was because I always wanted to hold his hand.
Or because I was proud of him for his accomplishments, no matter how much pain or fear they caused me.
It could have been because I was always so happy to see him,
Or because I was always there to listen when he needed me.
Was it because I always tried to make him feel like the most important person in the world...?
Was it because I really thought he was?
Was it because I cared too much?
Because I loved him too much?
Because I trusted him wholeheartedly?
Because I thought that he was the sweetest and most adorable man?
It could have been because I was always faithful, physically and emotionally,
Or because I was forgiving when he made mistakes, when everyone else said I should leave him for them.
Maybe it was because I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.
Really though...was it because I loved him too much or because of any of this stuff?
You're not the man I love.
I'm still in love,
With the man who gave me my necklace our first Christmas,
Who played video games with me.
The man who tucked me in to bed at night before he went home,
Who held my baby cousin when he was only a few weeks old.
The man who took me on a camping trip and let me go fishing with him,
Who took me to my first, and only, prom.
You are not that man anymore.
I'm still in love with the man who gave me butterflies in my stomach every time he kissed me,
The one who flirted with me when we managed the softball team together,
Who I always thought would be a great dad because he was so wonderful with kids.
The man I love took me to Christmas with his family,
He called me just to tell me I was beautiful.
The man I love was twice the man you are.
He slept every night with the stuffed dog that I gave him when I wasn't there beside him,
He moved me into my dorm at school and then out again a few months later,
He skipped NewMarket in the mornings to be beside me when I woke up.
The man I love called me one night when I was driving home from his house to tell me that he loved me...and was ok when I wasn't ready to say it back yet.
You are not the man I love.
What happened to that man?